Growing up in the Gulf means that for most of the year, you are going to stay indoors. Preferably with the air conditioning on full blast. So when school is out and most of your friends are travelling, what is left to do but hop on a game?

That is exactly how most of my summers were spent, and I remember receiving a lot of criticism for it. Socially, video games were seen as the horsemen of the apocalypse, signaling the end of kids playing outside.

The honest truth is that it is better for a child's development to go outside instead of playing games online. But placing the blame on children and making video games the sinister agents misses the point. The reason why video games hold such a strong substitute for going outside largely has to do with the elimination of accessible third spaces. In retrospect, video games were actually a saving grace for a child growing up in a society that is hostile to third spaces.

“The Great Good Place” by Ray Oldenburg defines the phenomenon of the third space as a social setting separate from home (the first place) and work (the second place) where people gather informally, build community, foster connections, and act as anchors for public life. Examples of such spaces are 17th century English coffeehouses, referred to as “Penny Universities”, which were crucial precursors to democracy; American taverns, which provided space for people of different backgrounds and religions to coexist; and French cafés which connected the individual with their community. When people gather and connect, information is transferred, and they are able to coordinate their attitudes towards society as a whole, one of the most fundamental aspects of social change.

So, at what point did these fundamental third spaces begin to phase out, and why would this even happen? Oldenberg argues that urbanization projects post World War II were designed to “protect people from community rather than connect them to it”. He cites examples of uncanny third spaces that have developed out of necessity. Vacant lots attract dog owners who use the justification of the dogs doing their business to socialize. A tree providing shade outside a convenience store sees working men coming together for a break over a beer. It is not like cafes, pubs and taverns disappeared, so what happened that changed these places from third spaces to something else?

The answer lies in the process of urbanization. Urban renewal is a way by which governments “revitalize” neglected areas in the city. Through investment into infrastructure (roads and highways), repurposing old spaces, and improving community amenities, underprivileged areas can be transformed into affluent neighborhoods. Although undeniably critical to the creation of a city, the way in which it is done seeks to fragment and depoliticize the public.

James Baldwin explains how, in 1963, urban renewal projects largely resulted in the removal of African American people from their homes. Projects disguised as community development served more to gentrify neighborhoods rather than improve them. By way of increasing the cost of living, they would kick out the previous inhabitants with no regard for where they would go next. Here, urban planners created class divides in society. One such instance is the New York City Metropolitan area.

Urbanization also led to the development of the suburban household community. Often in a secluded area, the suburban household was a large and glamorous residence marketed to the middle and upper middle class. These communities excel at encouraging people to spend more time inside by way of design. The residences typically have fences or walls enclosing the property. Everything one could ever need was inside these homes, even their very own slice of nature in the backyard. Perfect for going outside without actually going outside. The issue is that these homes motivate people to find their comfort exclusively indoors. Coupled with a cultural push towards privacy and avoiding “stranger danger”, the community aspect of society was phased out.

The suburban household fundamentally reorganized people's priorities, shifting them from communal to individual survival. Projects that promised these shiny big houses could often only be financed through loans from banks. The payments of these loans often trap homeowners in debt cycles where they cannot afford to pay off the loan while maintaining their current lifestyle, requiring them to take out another loan. The cycle repeats itself. Put simply, if you are worried about your family getting kicked out of your house next month, you do not have time to gather at the local pub and organize a petition for social change. This societal design perpetuated the functions of capitalism to an unprecedented level. Cafe and bar owners became a part of this urbanized city and had to adapt to survive. Those in gentrified areas had to increase their prices to pay the higher rent. While those in urbanized zones followed a business model that prioritized profit over community. Essentially, the design of our cities separated people through class divides and put a price tag on third spaces, commodifying hanging out.

Urbanization was not just implemented in the United States. These ideas were exported abroad to the whole world, including the United Arab Emirates. It is worth noting that suburban communities are a key facet of the UAE real estate scene. Advertisements for these luxury living neighborhoods pervade highway billboards. They push the narrative that these luxury compounds are where people come to be together. The idea of community is emphasized, but these neighborhoods still follow the same structure shared by their counterparts in the U.S. Granted, the push for parks and “community spaces” does serve to motivate people to leave the comfort of their homes, but this only applies to individuals residing within the community. And luxury living is not cheap.

Real estate companies claim to be spearheading the facilitation of third spaces through these suburban living projects. Unfortunately, this is false because of their fundamental misunderstanding of third spaces. Despite noting that third spaces are inexpensive locations, an article by Evolutions, a Dubai-based real estate company, lists Dubai Hills as a third space, community where the average home starts at minimum 1.7 million AED. Assuming you have not won the lottery or work at McKinsey, and are simply visiting the neighborhood, transport costs and food prices still separate people by class. Community activities are demanding on the wallet. To have fun, your options are limited to restaurants and cafes where the cheapest coffee is the price of a full meal in other parts of the city.

In this environment, people are motivated to enjoy the comfort of their home rather than go outside. When cafes, pubs, and third spaces become too expensive to frequent, cheaper forms of entertainment become a substitute for third spaces. Enter video games.

Far from the demonized perspective they are often framed in, video games actually serve as a place for modern people to be. Compared to the steep prices of going outside, consoles are a one-time purchase that can provide a much better return on investment. This phenomenon was first observed with the genesis of the internet. Games that highlighted their social aspect, such as Club Penguin and Poptropica, were widely popular in their era (shoutout to the Minecraft servers of our childhood). The community was cultivated by the developers through events and mysteries that got people bonding over the game.

Not to mention the digital chatrooms that provided a safe space for people to communicate. The recent events surrounding the COVID-19 pandemic proved this is not true only for the old internet. The explosion in popularity of games like Among Us and Gartic Phone on Discord showed that video games actually still work as a platform for human connection. Despite it being a turbulent time, some of the best memories people hold from the pandemic involve getting together over video games. While the popularity of video games has certainly declined post-pandemic, it did leave a permanent mark on the gaming industry. There is a whole sub-genre of games that focus purely on the social aspect. Features such as proximity chat were popularized by games such as Phasmo and Lethal Company and continue to do well on Steam charts to this day.

Video games are more than just online entertainment – they are a reason to come together. In a society where meeting outside is actively discouraged by urban design, this becomes more important than ever. I remember spending hours during COVID getting wiped out by third parties on Apex Legends just to have something to do with my friends. Most of the time, it was not even about the game, it was just about the connection.

Ultimately, video games cannot serve as a complete substitute for third spaces. The anonymous nature of the internet makes it incredibly difficult to hold people accountable for reprehensible behavior. Rather, video games should serve two purposes:

Increasingly, the new technological world is asking more of us to undo the effects of technology and society. “75 Hard” challenges and transitions to analog media beg us to get offline. But we need to remember the reason we went online in the first place.

Video games are not the enemy, they are a symptom of a society that is sick from a lack of human connection.